Posts Tagged ‘ Husband ’

Constant state of Reflection and Learning…

magnifying glassI have taken a small break from blogging lately to reflect and analyze many aspects of my life.  I am a husband, a Daddy, and a pastor of a new church.  Each one of these responsibilities brings it’s own set of responsibilities and challenges.  I’ll spare you (and me) the details of how tough I’ve realized it must be to be married to me.  My wife is my greatest supporter and cheerleader…and I have realized how much more of my time and love she needs.  My kids are growing up faster than I want them too!  I have not figured out how to slow down time…so I have been pondering ways to enjoy each day and be the best dad I can be.  

As far as being a church planter/pastor/creative paradox for Awestruck Church is concerned, I am discovering how much I have to learn!  Our church is 9 months old and every week is a learning experience.  I am learning the balance between entertainment and engagement.  I am learning the difference b/n what I want and what God wants.  (His way always works out better by the way)  I am learning the difference b/n being a “boss” and being a leader.  I am learning how to lead within my strengths and surround myself with people that pick up the slack of my weaknesses.  

As a leader (in any area of work or business) it is crucial that we constantly evaluate who we are and how we can improve.  Reading books, blogs, and going to conferences are great things!  I am learning that I can learn and be inspired by others, but simply copying and pasting others techniques into my life is detrimental to my personal progress.  Times of quiet reflection and (painfully) honest discussions with God produce the greatest results in my journey of becoming the greatest Husband, Daddy and pastor that I can be.  God created me with a purpose…I am committed to tenaciously chasing it with all that I am!

IIWTP Part 2…Doing What Only I can Do

If I were the Pastor…I would not neglect my wife and kids.  Ministry is a 24 hour a day position with the the expectation of being available to all people at all times.  Pastors are expected to give guidance, love, and support to the people in our church.  These are great things to do, but in the process we wear ourselves out and having nothing left for our own family.  I have been guilty of missing events with my family to spend time with other people.  I have missed out on enough valuable time that my kids now ask, “Is daddy going with us?” when they get dressed for an evening outing.  I left my own birthday dinner one year to make a hospital visit!  Pastors are great at being spiritual leaders for every family in their church, and often that leads to the neglect of their own wife and kids.

Now that I am the pastor I am making it my top priority to spend as much time as I can to love on my wife and youngins.  I have two responsibilities in life that only I can accomplish: Being a husband to my wife, and a Daddy to my kids.  There will be occasional situations that I have to be away, but gone are the days where I constantly choose the needs of others over the time my family needs from me.  I have made this commitment to my wife and communicated this very clearly to my leadership team.  I want to be the greatest husband and father that I can be.  I believe this is the greatest example I can set for the folks at Awestruck.  My number one value, outside of growing closer to Jesus, is loving and leading my family.

The Greatest Role I Play…

In my life I fill many roles.  I am am friend, a counselor, a pastor, son, brother, house keeper, coach, teacher, mentor, student, and many more.  What I am learning recently is that I have two roles that only I can fulfill.  Husband and Daddy.  I am the only one that can be the father of my children, and the husband to my wife.  I am fully embracing these roles, and prioritizing my time and efforts around being the best I can at these two things.  It has not been work, it has been the most fun I have ever had in my life.  There are no other people in this world I would rather spend time with than my family.  Tee Ball games, fish sticks and chocolate milk lunches, lots of princess and pirate time, being the bull for the cowboy, fixing hair into pony tails, splashing in the kiddie pool in freezing water, and dance parties…..I wouldn’t trade this for anything!  I am so thankful for the time to spend with my wife and kids.  I love my family.

You like to do what?

One of my favorite things to do as a Pastor is weddings.  Not all pastors love it, but I really enjoy every part of it.  I am doing my first official wedding as an official pastor in a few weeks.  I have done many weddings, but none as a lead pastor of my own church.  I love everything from the premarital counseling to the actual ceremony.  I don’t know why.  I usually don’t attend weddings that I am not having a part in.  Weddings are not really my thing, but performing weddings is something I truly enjoy.  There is something about the act of bringing two people together and getting to play a role in preparing them for all the excitement (and frustration, and hard work) that marriage brings.  In my optimistic mind, it is a chance to see a marriage that will last and not be given up on when times get tough.  Not a typical marriage in today’s time, where the couple stops putting forth the effort when it stops being convenient for them.  One of those marriages where the couples grows in love and doesn’t “fall out of love” too easily.  To me, it is a huge honor to be asked to take part in such a special day.  A day that will change both participants lives forever.  

My upcoming wedding will be one of the most special for me since I am very close to both the bride and groom.  They are my friends and partners in the Awestruck journey.  I was humbled in our first session when they were asked “Do you know someone that has a great marriage?” and both of them answered Me and Shannon.  What a high calling to not only be the officiating officer, but also the life mentor for Newly Weds.  If more people would choose to love their spouse and stick by them in all situations like they promised in their vows, I don’t think such a large number of my friends in their 20’s and 30’s would be on their second marriage!  Of all the weddings I have done, I am most looking forward to the Ricketts finally saying “I Do”.